Seeing You Again

This past weekend has been hell on my heart. I had almost convinced myself that I didn’t miss you, that I didn’t like you anymore, that maybe I wasn’t actually falling in love with you, but then I had to see you again. 

Just heading your name made the familiar ping of sadness return. Then I had to deal with you not looking at me. Why wouldn’t you look at me? 

My friend said it was because it would bring back the memories, all the moments we shared together, but I think she was just trying to make me feel better about the fact that I miss you so terribly. I don’t think I’ve ever missed a guy this much. 

I can feel the sharp pain in my heart just thinking about you. I really wish you would have looked at me, said hello to me, or just wasn’t a complete jerk to me when I tried to apologize to you for everything that happened. I just want to be your friend again. 

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